Changing your world aids in changing the world

Change can be good; change can seem bad.

But making the conscious decision to change for the better is when you can make waves of chang

Mistakes don‘t define you

I have made many bad decisions in my lifetime. My 25 years of drug and alcohol abuse along with the criminal activity I was involved in are things I will be sharing with you in hopes of helping others see that change is possible and there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Drugs are bad

If you can smoke it, snort it or swallow it chances are I have done it. Chemical waste spill, trash can, junkie and any other name you associate with a drug addict I’ve been called it. But I managed to raise three children in the midst of my wild addiction.

My angels

My first son slowed me down, but I still managed to find myself out some nights. I began working a full-time job to support my family which kept me from hanging on the streets all night. I still managed to find myself out some nights, but I always made it to work even on little to no sleep. We lived with my mother for the first three years and that truly was a blessing just like her. After moving into our first apartment our second son was born. Being a parent taught me a lot, and it definitely forced me to grow up. Unfortunately, I did yell a lot, thanks stepdad, but it did help because it would scare them enough, they would freeze. There was absolutely no smoking or drug use in front of them, but they were around drinking which I realized later in life is not any better. We moved from our apartment after 4 years into our first house and that’s where our daughter was born. Sad to say that this is where my lifestyle finally caught up to me.

In and out and missing out

I committed a crime and landed myself in the county prison sentenced to 9-23 months. I did 7 months with good time and was paroled to the streets. I could only make it a month or so and ended up incarcerated again for violating parole. So I ended up doing 7 months 3 different times. I missed a lot of my daughters’ firsts, birthday, baptism and many other occasions for my kids.

Can’t get right

Even after all of that I still could not manage to stop using drugs and alcohol. I would go a week or two and end up drinking and before I knew it doing drugs again. I went through a lot from being homeless to losing friends and some family and many deaths just to name a few. But today I can proudly say I have thirty months clean at the time of writing this. It was a long 25 years of addiction, but it almost feels like a lifetime ago and I haven’t hit three years yet. The changes I have made mentally and the internal growth I have gone through have morphed me into a whole new person. Even the mother of my kids has said she doesn’t know who I am anymore.

If I can do it…..

As you change your inner world, your outer world has no choice but to follow suit. I can tell you this from personal experience. So, take it one day at a time, if you have to take it an hour at a time. Just remember it gets better, I promise you. Positive outlook= positive outcome. The mindset in my opinion is the first thing you should work on, aside from any drug and or alcohol addiction. Chances are if you have had struggles with addiction then you live in what is called survival mode. A simple web search will tell you all you need to know. To me that is one of the most challenging to overcome especially when you still live in the same environment. The object is to rise above and train yourself to only see the good. Practicing gratitude is another game changer. When you are grateful for the little things it makes room for the larger blessings to enter your life.

Thank you

Thank you for taking the time to read this. I genuinely appreciate and love you. Have a wonderful and safe journey in this game called life.